Seemed like a good idea at the time

I know what I forgot to blog about, and if I don't, I expect Merry will tell everyone anyway! I suppose it's too funny a story (in retrospect) to keep to myself.

Well, I don't ever remember having earache before, but in the middle of the Kessingland week, my ear started to feel very odd and sore. Not really bad, but of course I wondered if it might get worse and I may end up in agony at some point. I couldn't decide whether to go straight to the doctor or not, but decided a 'wait and see' policy would have to do. So there I was, in the middle of a Suffolk field, in a caravan, with all my normal resources (local chemist, doctor, acupuncturist friend, homeopath) a long way away. And then I had a brilliant idea! I had a perfect, anti-bacterial liquid immediately to hand, or perhaps I should say, immediately at boob. It is recommended to apply breastmilk when a baby has a little eye infection (sticky eye), and it really does clear it up. So, breastmilk in the ear seemed like a perfect solution (pun intended!). So I expressed a little into a cup and put a few drops in my ear. I did that one evening, and the following morning, but by the next day things were worse. The ear was quite sore, I couldn't lie on that side, and it had got totally blocked up and I couldn't hear anything with that ear. So I phoned the local doctor's surgery and got an appointment to see the nurse.

I told her all about my symptoms, and then she peered into my ear with her clever ear-inspection thingy (otoscope?). "Oh, you've got a horrible fungal infection in there," she said. "It's all white and damp." Then I remembered. And told her about my attempts at self-medication. She did a perfectly professional job at keeping a straight face, although was clearly nonplussed by this apparently normal-looking stupid weirdo! "I've never heard of it (breastmilk) being anti-bacterial and working against sticky eye," she said. "I'll have to ask my microbiologist friend about that! But even so, the ear is enclosed and warm and probably not a good environment for putting anything into ......" I had to admit she had a point! And felt rather stupid .....

Several conventional antibiotic eardrops later and things are much improved. So remember, potential earth-mothers out there, breastmilk does not cure everything!

The week we had

Must blog about Kessingland, although with two twitchy girls currently being my only company, I am liable to be frequently interrupted.

Overall, I had a great week. Although originally I was somewhat hacked off with Bill for deciding not to stay, in the end it avoided that feeling of divided loyalties of wanting to spend time with online friends who I wanted to get to know better, and DH with whom I don't spend enough time either. So I was glad to be able to spend satisfactory (although would have liked more) amounts of time sitting, chatting and generally hanging out, after sending Tamsin off to play with sundry other children and putting Isabelle down on a mat with her fellow triplettes (made-up word for small female triplets?!) and a few toys.

The good stuff:
The weather for the first half of the week
Tamsin going off and playing with others (last year she wouldn't leave my side at all) and especially bonding with Naomi (of Stef and Dawniy); Barbara's E and B, and Freya whose family wasn't on the list of attendees so I'm still not sure who her Mum is but she liked us so much she came and spent a night in our caravan!
A lovely conversation with Ammi on Friday
Going to Sea-Life in Great Yarmouth
Joining the blogring bandwagon by getting a Lidl like-a-bike equivalent
Getting to know people a bit better, esp. Katherine and Helen/Chris
The MuddlePuddle triplets of Isabelle, BB and Josie
Basket-weaving
Just getting away from it all

The bad stuff:
Not getting any decent time on the beach because by the time we tried (Thurs/Fri) it was too cold and windy and rainy. In all Tamsin's 4 years we've never spent more than 10 minutes on a beach.
Not spending much time with Jax, Alison or Merry - we just never seemed to be in the same place at the same time
Feeling humbled that Kris towed her own caravan, whereas I got Bill to drive us there & back. OTOH, if I learn to do it myself, I'll be expected to just do it alone from then on .....

I'm sure there was more but can't remember right now. Will edit later if I remember more vital stuff!

Very strange - just noticed the 'IQ test' post has disappeared. Is the universe trying to tell me something...?

Home again

Got back about 6pm; got lots of lovely things to read in the post (one of my favourite things about being away is all the post-opening when I get back) - Home Education Magazine, Mothering magazine, "Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain" book which I have bought 2nd hand, and, most interestingly of all, Benjamin's birth notes which I have just got from medical records in Birmingham. Am now thinking that I want to get his medical notes from his surgery etc, just for completeness.

Oh, and the other thing we came home to was Bill's appointment for a vasectomy - on our 15th wedding anniversary in September!!! Much thinking to do about that.

Nearly there...

Last blog before going off to Kessingland. I've been trying to pack since about 2pm and it's now after 11pm and there's still stuff to do - I'm leaving the rest till the morning now.

Tamsin fell asleep at 5pm, and I left her there hoping she was so exhausted (long story) that she'd stay there all night, but no, she woke up at 8pm and is still up with us! We're all off to bed shortly, though.

Looking forward to the week!

See lots of you soon!

Must get on with stuff....

No packing been done here yet ... must get on with it tomorrow afternoon, which is the only chance I'll get. DH isn't coming ..... or at least, he is going to drive the caravan to Kessingland and stay till Sunday and then come home again for a week getting stuff done at home. Chance would be a fine thing, is all I can say ....

I feel like I only got about 3 hours of sleep last night, what with one thing and another. Had to work this morning, with a fussy and irritable Isabelle stopping me get a thing done, and the same will happen tomorrow morning.

Hmm, this is just disjointed ramblings really. Too tired to blog straight .... must go to bed.

Oh, I know what I was going to say. Benjamin's anniversary passed unremarkably yesterday. I would normally have a candle burning all day, but was out too much to do that. And I even forgot to take the cute little stone trough and plants up to the grave last night - took them this morning instead. I still think of him pretty much every day, even after 6 years, so really an anniversary day isn't that much different to any other.

Sunday night fever

And Monday night fever. Tamsin's not well - she's got what Bill had all last week, with what I guess must be laryngitis (not much of a voice and very croaky) and a bad cough. And a bit of a high temperature, especially at night. Poor thing was quite delirious last night for a while. Of course, as soon as she gets up in the morning, she's fairly bright and lively, and won't do me the favour of languishing on the sofa all day, like other people's ill children do, to let me recover from the disturbed night. Anyway, she's learning about normal body temperature and the immune system fighting off infections as we go!

So, Monday was quite good. We started off the morning with 'track', of course - a pretty much daily occurrence for at least the past year. We also had another game of Pairs, and some skittles, and then Linda, my hairdresser, came to the house to give us a trim. It was her first time back since having her baby Louisa, who was born 3 weeks before Isabelle. We were supposed to be due about 2 months apart, but then I was 2 weeks early, and she was over 2 weeks late and ended up with an emergency caesarean. Anyway, Louisa and Isabelle sat and looked at each other and played with the toys and grabbed them from each other and cooed and were generally extremely cute! Tamsin, however, refused to let the scissors anywhere near her hair and generally threw a complete strop, but I guess I'll let her off on the grounds of being rather under par. But please excuse any resemblance to a scarecrow next week at Kessingland!

Then Isabelle needed a nap and the dog needed a walk, so I got Isabelle into the buggy and we all walked into town where I picked up a few things to eat, and met several people to stand and chat with :-)

Home again, and we sat in the shade of our lilac tree and had some lunch, and then Tamsin complained of being tired and cold (!), so she curled up on the bean-bag and watched some TV. At about 3pm I asked her if she would like to go and see Henry the Harris Hawk, with whom she appeared on the front page of our local newspaper a few weeks ago after he had visited playschool. She said yes, so we set off up to the Falconry centre. We arrived in time for a demonstration, so we saw a falcon being flown, and then we asked if we could see Henry, so the man got Henry out to fly. He did several low-flying manoeuvres very close to our heads, which freaked Tamsin out a bit and she started to say she wanted to go home, and she didn't want to hold him :-( Never mind - I'd forgotten my camera anyway! We looked around a little, but Tamsin was really a bit scared of the birds, even though they were in cages, so we left, not really having had £7.50's worth! We wandered up to the nearby Batsford Garden Centre, where I used to work before I had Tamsin, and said hi to some ex-colleagues. Isabelle coughed a lot and consequently did a major puke while I was sitting in the office talking to my ex-boss! We had a brief wander round the garden centre where I got a small stone trough and some low-growing plants to make a permanent pot for Benjamin's grave, to take up there on Wednesday. We've had some spring bulbs in the plot, and also occasionally go up and put fresh flowers, but most of the time it's just been bare grass by the headstone, and that doesn't feel right. I'll feel better knowing there's a permanent flowery indication that he is not forgotten.

After getting home and a quick salad tea, I bathed Isabelle but Tamsin refused. I at last got round to changing the sheets that had been on the bed all last week while Bill was ill. Tamsin and Isabelle fell asleep quickly, and I lay there for a while, relaxing and dozing. 45 minutes later, Tamsin woke up confused and feverish, and vomited on the clean bed :-( I was just about to get the Calpol and dose her up when she just conked out again and slept fitfully for the rest of the night in our bed.

Some like it hot.....

but I don't. Phew, days like this mean I just lie around feeling lethargic and sweaty. Attractive, huh?

The day started in a wobbly kind of way too, with Isabelle being awake from 6am and despite yawning and appearing to be quite tired still, wouldn't go back to sleep. So we got up and came downstairs, and I did a quick round of the blogring. Or at least, I got as far as Merry's blog, which reduced me to a sobbing heap and I had to go and get my beautiful, cuddly, perfect baby and just hug her, crying madly. She is just so perfect right now, so adorable and beautiful, and I wish I could keep her like this forever and ever. Of course, it's exciting and lovely to see the development too, and I love so many of the stages to come, but something about my current mood is just making me feel grief and loss at her moving on from what she is now. (Oh, DUH! I only just thought of this - could it be because the anniversary of Benjamin's death is coming up on Wednesday...? Strange how the grief can get you even when you haven't been thinking about it. You might not think so from reading this blog, especially as I have recently had another baby which brings things up again, but I really feel the loss of Benjamin is a fairly small corner of my life now, but I guess this is what it means when people say you never totally 'get over it' - it pops up at odd times even when you aren't anticipating it.)

After recovering, the day went fairly nicely. Tamsin has developed a very husky voice and a cough so I didn't think we ought to go to church this morning, even though she is well apart from that. So yesterday and today we have had much splashing in the 'paddling' pool, which is actually what I bought as a birth pool but never had time to get into for the birth. I put Isabelle on the lawn with a bowl of water and utensils to splash in it, but she either didn't 'get it' or wasn't interested, unlike when she is in the bath when she splashes madly with great delight. However she was happy to sit there for quite long periods of time.


What's this green stuff?


Love the pool!

Later Tamsin played on one of her Learning Land CD-Roms, which included identifying various insects among other things. We've played some games of 'pairs' with a set of cards she got for her birthday, and she's got a pretty good memory for the position of the cards. We went for a walk in the woods, and talked about the different leaf sizes of many of the plants, and I showed her how to identify a fern. Oh, and yesterday we did the 'OW' lesson in 'Sound of the Week' and she did a fabulous job of looking at the pictures I had printed off, and finding the appropriate word to go with it. She was probably mostly just choosing by the first letter, but slowly, we are making progress. I am thinking of making a semi-serious 'start' on reading, if she seems happy to, in September when she would 'normally' have been starting Reception class. No push and no rush, but as long as she is comfortable with it I think she is beginning to show some readiness for reading. She has all the letters extremely confidently under her belt, and, having learned them in the 'phonic' way (a, buh, cuh, etc) she is now thrilled that she has learned the 'ABC song' and sings it several times a day. Also, having agreed to purchase a good portion of the Sonlight Pre-K curriculum from Katy B, we will probably start that in September too.

While Isabelle had a nap this morning, I watched the 'Sign with your Baby' video that I had and used with Tamsin. Isabelle is about the right age to start signing to her, although it is likely to be 2-3 months at least before she starts signing back. We did some of this with Tamsin, although we found it difficult to remember to do the signs consistently so it was never a major thing. She did learn signs for milk, Poppy (the dog), aeroplane and flower and maybe a few others. I would love to be more consistent with Isabelle, though, because again watching that video I was welling up with tears because it is such an amazing thing to see such little children so clearly communicating.

I'm sure there's been other stuff today, but can't remember what. As far as other members of the family go, I think one of the hens might be going broody. She's sat in the nesting box just about all afternoon. It could be the heat, but she definitely needs keeping an eye on. It means she would sit there for about 3 weeks barely eating enough to keep going, and not laying, and blocking up the nesting box so the others would find it difficult to lay. To stop it you're supposed to put them in a wire cage for a few days, but (a) I haven't got one and (b) it seems a bit harsh. I'm going to do a bit of online research to see if there's anything else I can do.

New baby must-haves

I could have done with some of these a few months ago, *especially* number 4 and number 6. Number 3 would still come in useful!

Tamsin's party

Phew, it's taking a few days to recover! All went extremely well, except that I forgot to take any photos. I managed to take one of the cake after everyone had gone!


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It was a Dora the Explorer party. Bill had done an amazing job constructing an adventure at the bottom of the garden, and drawing a map, and a friend had helped me make a Backpack for each child. They were told that Swiper the fox had stolen some of the gifts they were supposed to take home, so they had to go and look for them. They had to go through the Grumpy Old Troll's Secret Garden, who wouldn't let them through until they made him happy by planting some nasturtium seeds in a trough. Then they had to go over Rainbow Mountain (our climbing frame), collecting a Dora bookmark to put into their backpack on the way, then down the slide, look for Swiper because he lived somewhere near the bottom of the peartree, shout "Swiper no swiping" so that they could reclaim their prizes (a Kinder Surprise egg), then find a lost baby animal and take it through the bendy tunnel to reunite it with its mother at the other end. We also had Dora the Explorer dot-to-dots when the children arrived, and I had prepared Pin the Backpack on Dora, and another running round game, neither of which we had time to do. We did some dancing, some Musical Statues, and some general running around and playing, followed by lots of food and the Dora cake.

Tamsin enjoyed her Dora the Explorer house she got as her main present :


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Unfortunately, Bill having been ill in bed all day on Thursday (his birthday), he made heroic efforts to be up and busy and helpful on Friday and Saturday, and then relapsed and has been in bed ever since. He really has been feeling rough. Nevertheless I can't help feeling somewhat envious of a few days in bed sleeping (yawn)!

Isabelle enjoys a book:


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Party preparations

Oh my goodness, I can so see why people pay lots of money to have their children's birthday parties elsewhere than at home. I wasn't thinking clearly when I invited 15 - luckily a couple can't come, but it's still a mammoth task! I have a mountain of tasks to get on with, but just had to have a quick blog while Bill took the kids out to the library.

Bill was in bed ill all day on his birthday - didn't even feel like opening any presents until 7pm. I have a very sore throat and he is still majorly coughing. But I had more success than I anticipated doing Tamsin's Dora cake last night - it only took me until 12.30am - I thought I might be up till 2! Photos later, or tomorrow!

Birth-day Part 2

So, 4 years ago, I woke at 1am with definite pains. I left Bill asleep in the chair next to my bed, while I went to find a midwife, who suggested I get in the bath. I had told them I wanted to use the birth pool but it was too early for that yet (so we thought). While I was in the bath, Bill woke up and panicked when he couldn't find me! Despite expecting to find the bath comforting, I wasn't getting any benefit from being in there, so had just decided to get out again when Bill found me. We fixed my TENS machine in place, and then as things hotted up, the midwives suggested I went upstairs to the delivery room. I remember walking up those stairs and having to stop in the middle while a contraction came. At my request, they started filling the birth pool, but it quickly became apparent that there wasn't going to be time to get into it. She was born at 2.55am.

This morning, she wasn't in such a hurry to see the world, and I was waiting and waiting for her to wake up, and in the end had to wake her up at 8am. She was going to playschool for the morning, so we had limited time. I had got all her presents out the night before, but I went downstairs and hid all but one as there just wouldn't be time for them. She was a bit bleary for a while, and didn't show much pleasure at her new Dora the Explorer outfit which I thought she might want to wear to playschool. We all got ready and then I took her to playschool along with her big Thomas the Tank Engine cake to share with her friends at snack time. I had to work from 11-1pm, so Bill (who had the day off) collected her from playschool. She'd had a lovely morning, and shortly after I got back we got the presents out and had a fun time as she opened them all. She got some clothes, a bit of cash, a sticker-making machine, a few small toys and the much-sought-and-eventually-found Dora the Explorer Talking House which she was absolutely thrilled with and played with for ages.

Unfortunately Bill was fighting a losing battle against some sort of cough/general viral infection (which I am showing signs of too) and went off to bed for a couple of hours, so the rest of us walked the dog and then played/read/babbled as appropriate!

Dinner, bath and bed were followed by preparations (mine) for Bill's birthday tomorrow and Tamsin's party on Saturday, for which I actually need about another week to prepare, I think!

Is anybody out there?

Where have all my commenters gone (except Merry)? I'm feeling a bit lonely here! Is anybody listening?

4 years ago....

we'd all just voted in the General Election, and then I'd gone to hospital to have Tamsin's birth induced. I was highly anxious and stressed, knowing far more than I ever wanted to about stillbirths and neonatal deaths after losing Benjamin. Tamsin had a very irregular heartbeat, which the consultant assured me was nothing to worry about, but hearing it on the monitor, I could so easily imagine it just stopping, and I knew I'd feel happier with her out than in. So the Prostin gel was applied in the morning, then we went for a wander round Cheltenham to wait for things to get going. I started to feel a very slight something in Marks & Spencer, and hoped my waters would break there so I would get free clothes for life, or something like that, but sadly it was not to be. We returned to the hospital for a second Prostin gel in the late afternoon, and although I kept on my feet in the hope it would get things going quicker, in the end we gave up at about 10pm and I went to bed. I woke up at 1am..... ah, but that's tomorrow's story.

Anyway, back to the present. We had a full day today, catching the train at 9.20am to go to London and the Science Museum. My Mum got on the train at Reading and came along with us, which made things a great deal easier. We saw lots of obvious home-edders milling around, and chatted to Carol from Andover who is on the MuddlePuddle list. Tamsin really enjoyed "The Garden" in the basement, but wasn't impressed with the other galleries we had a quick look in - "I'm getting quite bored, Mummy," she said. So, of course, we then went to the shop to indulge in some retail therapy, where I bought her some 'Magic Plastic' balloon-making stuff; some no-spill bubble mixture, and a little glow-in-the dark 'box of bones' which we put together on the train on the way home, during which I took the opportunity of teaching her about the skull, jaw, shoulder blades, names of leg and arm bones and the pelvis and ribs. Oh, and I treated myself to a necklace in Accessorize on Paddington Station!

Isabelle was just a dream baby today - she is amazing! The journey to London was perfectly timed for her nap, so she slept all the way there. She was quiet and relaxed all the time we were out and about, had another nap in the buggy during the afternoon, and was happy and cute on the train on the way home.

Tamsin was disappointed we didn't get time to go to the Natural History Museum and look at the dinosaurs which I had told her about, so I think she'll be demanding another visit to London before long. In the meantime, I still have some preparations to be done for her birthday tomorrow, so I'd better dash.

Not much of interest today except a trip to the dentist for me to sort out some discoloured old fillings on my front teeth so now I don't have to be embarrassed when I smile (vbg). I've been smiling at myself admiringly in the mirror since I got home. Bill took an hour off work to supervise the girls while I was drilled and filled. I'm having an old veneer re-done too, so soon I shall really have a totally new smile and then I'll have to start planning the botox and the tummy tuck to really qualify for the "Ten Years Younger" programme. OK, I'm kidding! I prefer to save the money and cultivate the attitude that my burgeoning wrinkles and grey hair give me 'character'!

Tamsin and Isabelle were really good with the very boring morning driving to Oxford, waiting in a car park and then driving back to Moreton. Stopped off on the way to sort out some wrapping paper, birthday cards etc and then home to sort stuff out. As well as Tamsin's birthday on Wednesday, we have Bill's on Thursday! And Tamsin's party on Saturday. So there's a lot to get ready!

I'm a bit worried about one of the chickens - the one which lays blue eggs hasn't laid for 3 days now .... the trouble is, I don't know which one of the 3 it is. I've put a call in to a friend who knows more about this stuff because I don't know if it's a big problem or not.

Sunday

Didn't go to church this morning, as it was the annual Outdoor Service. I have extremely clear memories of being at that service in 1999 with Benjamin, so happy and full of pride in him, and I don't think I can bear to go now. Or maybe I could bear it, but I want that memory to remain his, and not be overlaid with others.

Instead I tried to take it easy, having been woken for the second day in a row at 5.30am by Isabelle, who wasn't inclined to go back to sleep after that. Tamsin took the hint I had left out the night before, and started filling in a handwriting workbook, as she has shown much more interest in writing recently. She enjoyed it, but didn't take well to being corrected as to how to write some of the letters. "I'm doing it my way", she said. "I'm only trying to show you how to do it more easily", I said, and she responded, "but I like doing things the hard way." Hmmm, what can you do? Leave her to do it whichever way she likes, in the hope that the correct way of writing will gradually sink in if she watches others do it, or keep on trying to show her the right way? I certainly feel it bodes ill for anything that I might try and 'teach' her in future!

Bill did some fantastic stuff in the garden, preparing for Tamsin's Dora the Explorer birthday party next Saturday. There's going to be some sort of treasure hunt/exploring thing, so he's constructed a whole adventure playground sort of affair, out of old fence panels, LOL! In the meantime, after a lot of effort, I have managed to track down and obtain a Dora Talking House, whew! Tamsin doesn't even know such a thing exists, yet, but once I saw it I really knew that's what I wanted to get her, but whenever I located a supplier, they stopped being able to supply it by the time I wanted to order. Eventually found an Ebay shop that could send me one.

I also put another coat of paint on one of Tamsin's little toyboxes that we got months ago and have been meaning to paint (still one more coat to do on this one, and then need to do the second one); tidied up the living room a little; had a good long nap with Isabelle to try and catch up on some sleep; had a picnic on the lawn for lunch; set Tamsin to 'painting' with water on the patio, and then she 'washed' the windows (i.e. made them dirtier); cleaned out the chickens; and tried to get my head round the busy week ahead.

The first ....... of many?

Here's what Tamsin did on Friday:




I was a pony-mad girl; loved riding from age 3 or 4 till I was in my 20s, dreamed of owning a pony, but by a bit of bad planning managed to be born into an impoverished clergy family, and had to make do with helping out at the local stables and riding other people's horses and ponies occasionally. So I thought it would be nice to see whether Tamsin might like it too, even though she's born into a moderately impoverished family too!

By going through the Fair Shares scheme (which is where I work) I arranged a trial ride for Tamsin with Sarah, who also happens to be her playschool leader. Being prone to being a bit of a nervous child at times, I wasn't sure how Tamsin would get on, but she absolutely loved it. I foresee more riding in her future!

Singing in Spanish

How about that! Tamsin learned a whole song in Spanish from watching Dora the Explorer, and sang it to me at the dinner table this evening. I was impressed! We've also been educating her in small-scale commerce today, by taking some of our clutter to a car-boot sale. We made a grand total of about £15 profit, but that's better than spending twice that much on a Bank Holiday day out. So the weekend has consisted mostly of tidying up a bit and sorting out stuff to sell.

Actually, did you notice how casually I dropped in that 'dinner table' line? We haven't eaten at the dinner table for months, but I managed to clear all the junk off it on Saturday morning so I've felt we're more like a respectable family now! And Isabelle is joining us in her highchair, now that she can sit. She, of course, wears more of her food than she actually eats, and definitely can't be doing with any of that puree stuff. She wants real food, dammit, that she can hold and stuff in her mouth! And then spit out. Hmmm. She's also working hard on attaining the position for eventual crawling. She's figured out the arms and is now working on the legs - she's tried legs straight and up on her toes, bending legs but hips still on the floor, wriggling from side to side, and on the bed this morning she had her bum right in the air but I haven't seen her do that on the floor yet. I wonder how long it will take till she actually crawls? Tamsin didn't manage it till about a week before she walked, so this feels new.

I've been restricting TV a bit more this weekend, and Tamsin has played with Brio, Mega-bloks, finger puppets, building bricks, stickle bricks, a piece of string and other miscellaneous bits and pieces. I've read her some books, and it's interesting to see that she is paying more attention to looking carefully at words when she knows what they say, e.g. the title of a book. It's like she's starting to teach herself the 'whole word' approach to reading. Definitely something changing there.

Tomorrow morning is the group at church, and then I think I'll go down to Cirencester for the afternoon.

Did the entire blogring go to the library yesterday? It certainly seems like it from the ones I've read, and we did too. As well as books, I got an 8-CD set of Spanish lessons by Michel Thomas ... as Tamsin is very motivated to learn spanish at the moment (due to Dora!) and I thought we might have a go together, if it's any good.

The big news is Isabelle's - she has a second tooth, and is SITTING! She seems totally at ease with her new perspective and suddenly seems to me to be a lot more grown up.

Pretty much no obvious home-ed going on at the moment. Just being out of the house for much of the day and Nick Jr when we're home. Though, Tamsin did get out her Letterland letter cards this morning before breakfast and started searching through for the letters to spell her name, found them all on her own and only needed some subtle stretching out of the way I said 'Tamsin' to remember which order they all went in.

Some days are diamonds (some days are stone)

John Denver is a great resource for blog titles, I am finding ....!

Ah, where does the time go? I have had a completely manic few days, and the bulk of Tamsin's education seems to have been being shouted at to hurry up and get ready, sitting in the car listening to Mr Men songs and stories, and being shouted at because she's taken her shoes off in the car again and I have to put them back on her before we get out. Gorgeous mini Reebok trainers bought for a couple of pounds at an NCT second-hand sale are all very well, but they have laces, which she can't do yet!

I had a moral dilemma on Monday. Monday is our totally free day with no regular appointments or activities, so it's when I sometimes arrange to go out for the day to see a friend. I had an arrangement to see someone this week, and in fact had already had to postpone it from a few weeks ago. When I went back to work I found that, while I was on maternity leave, a meeting had been arranged with the Charity's trustees and fundraiser for this Monday. As usual I dithered and dallied, and only made a decision on Sunday that friendship took priority over going to work on a non-working day for me (my job-share partner, Kate, works that day). So in the end we had a lovely few hours out at a soft play place in Evesham, and again making a change from past behaviour, Tamsin was mostly able to go off and play with my friend's daughter, leaving us to have nice adult chat! I even amazed myself by getting a meal ready in the slow-cooker before I left, so that was great to come home to.

Tuesday saw us going off to a new group (mostly mums and kids) at church, where the little ones can go in the creche and we actually get some really good heart-to-heart sharing, praying and laughing together. This group used to run a few years ago, when I first attended this church, and it was this fantastic group of women who made me feel so welcome and supported me in tremendous ways with all we went through with Benjamin and then Tamsin. I was really sad when the group stopped a couple of years ago due to dwindling numbers, but we now have another baby-boom and lots of new members, plus a new woman in the church who is skilled in leading parenting and relationship-building courses etc so I took the initiative in asking her to start up this group again. They first met last week while I was at Hesfes.

Anyway, we had a great time, and I think it is going to be good for me spiritually and relationally, but I had chatted with a friend on the phone the night before who told me there was a new woman there who was home-educating her four children. I was thrilled! So at the end, I grabbed her for a chat, and told her I was home-educating mine, and wasn't it great, but she brought me down with a bump when she told me it was a strictly temporary situation for her, they had just come back to this country from Bahrain and knew they would be unsettled for a few months before they found a suitable house and job etc, so she was only doing this in the meantime. She thought it was terrible for them socially, she showed me the bundle of workbooks that her oldest son had brought with him (CGP) (and I think that's the only way she knows how to do home-ed) and she will be getting them into school at the earliest opportunity! By this time, the kids had seen us and were clamouring for attention, so we didn't get the chance for more conversation (i.e. I didn't get the chance to put her straight!!) but I felt a bit rebuffed and have suffered twinges of embarrassment since then. I don't cope very well with people thinking I'm an idiot to have chosen such a path deliberately - *must toughen up!* - and on top of that I had also just ranted about how useless the disposable nappies had been last week while camping and how Isabelle always got poo all up her back, and received a shower of comments from everybody else about how 'brave' I was (meaning a hippy weirdo of dubious hygiene and sanitation practices) but how they all wouldn't dream of it and loved their disposables. Well, try explaining to your great great great great grandchildren why they could still visit a landfill site and see the nappies used on their ancestors then. And try telling your little boy why his sperm count is low because you overheated his testicles in disposable nappies, and marinated them in various toxic chemicals. Humph.

Anyway, to quickly finish before I go off to work for a couple of hours, I am also busy trying to plan Tamsin's 'Dora the Explorer' party (what else? - although till a couple of months ago I still thought we would be having a Thomas the Tank Engine party!). To my surprise (*) I found on Ebay a 'Dora's talking house' which is virtually unobtainable in this country any more, despite me having found a couple of suppliers who stopped being able to get them by the time I wanted one. The auction ended at midnight last night, so I intended to be hovering over my keyboard to make a last-minute bid. However, sleep won over, and I missed, but on checking this morning I am very glad I did as the price went up to £87 and the RRP is only £49.99 (and, of course, only $49.99 in the USA, but none of them will ship over here).

* I was surprised because a couple of months ago I kept looking on Ebay and consistently I could find the furniture and figures for the house but never the actual house itself.

Anyway, must go. The house looks like a hurricane has hit it and I'm overwhelmed ...

Hey, it's good to be back home again

We all had a lovely church weekend away at the Pioneer Centre, Cleobury Mortimer. Although with small children we didn't get to spend much time in the main sessions, but we had a good time anyway. Amazingly (huh? - this is GOD we are talking about!) the one hour of the one session that I did manage to get to was aimed perfectly at me, reaching me exactly where I am and really helping me move on a few steps. Isabelle's godparents Lana and David were total stars, with Lana getting her to sleep a couple of times and both of them having Isabelle on their lap for a while at several meals so we could actually eat using both hands.

So that's why we didn't get to Hesfes till Monday. For those friends of mine who read this blog and don't know what Hesfes is, it's the Home Educators Seaside Festival - a week-long camp for, erm, home-educators, obviously. It was our first visit, and with a certain notoriety about it, I wasn't quite sure what to expect. And especially as I was going to be spending 5 days in a small caravan with Tamsin and Isabelle but without Bill, I was a bit nervous at how it might go!

We took our usual leisurely time to get organised and on the move on Monday, so didn't arrive in Charmouth until about 6 or 7pm. Sarah had been extremely helpful by saving my electric hook-up pitch by parking her car there - small as the space was, it was better than nothing, which is what I suspect might have happened had she not been so helpful. So we were met by Alison and Sarah, and waved briefly to Jax, Merry, Barbara and maybe others before getting stuck in to getting the caravan set up. Bill left for the 3-hour drive home at about 9pm, and I got the kids to bed and ventured out of the van only to say Hi to my friend Jo who lives in my small town and was there with her 10-year old son. She had a programme which I was able to look through and get some idea of what was going on on-site through the week. I made a mental note to head for the Yoga for Under-5's on Wednesday morning, but nothing much on Tuesday appealed to me. After that I quickly headed for bed, sharing a rather small double bed with 2 children plus hordes of rowdy kids going up and down the road meant a rather disturbed night.
First impressions: a somewhat scruffy campsite absolutely teeming with hordes of strange-looking, unruly kids doing very dangerous things down a steep hill with skateboards, bikes etc.

On Tuesday morning after getting up and ready we wandered out for a look round the site to see what was what. We headed down the hill to the play park and found Alison, Merry and Jax there with their various kids, and I was pleased to note that on the whole Tamsin felt confident enough to go off and play on the equipment on her own instead of wanting me to follow her round and hold her hand all the time. So I was able to sit and have a bit of chatting time with the adults, which was nice. Later on we went up the hill from our caravan to find out where the marquees were that held the workshops and events, and had a general wander round. In the afternoon I needed a couple of things from the site shop, so wandered down only to find it shut, so we carried on out of the site to check out the beach. Had a lovely 45 minutes or so down there but were unprepared with no suncream or anything so we all got a little bit too much of the sun on our faces and didn't notice due to the stiff breeze. Went back up to the campsite and joined the gang of Puddlers sitting chatting. It was nice to meet Joyce and Barbara again, having only passed a few words with both of them at Kessingland last year, and later on I also met Nic, Heather and Alexia. As the afternoon/evening wore on, Tamsin had a lovely time running about and playing with Jax's Small and Barbara's B. In fact, one of the best parts of the week for me was seeing the difference in Tamsin from last year to this. Many might remember that at Kessingland she would barely venture more than a foot or two from me or Bill, and hardly played with any other children at all due to shyness and lack of confidence to go anywhere without us. This year she has run around, played with and talked to children she doesn't know, and generally been a much more confident child.

On Wednesday morning at 9am I remembered about the kids' yoga, so managed to get up to the main marquee in time to participate. It was really yoga for the adults with the hope that the kids would want to join in, which they mostly did, although Tamsin's idea of joining in was mostly running round and round the large marquee pretending to be an aeroplane, which was OK! While there I discovered that the week's programme of events was posted up in the marquee, so that was handy, as otherwise I wouldn't have remembered what else was going on all week. On returning to the campsite area I discovered that several Puddlers were planning on packing up and leaving due to adverse weather reports for the rest of the week, but as I had no car there was no way I could join this general exodus even if I had wanted to. However enough people I knew were sticking around to make it OK. I did phone Bill and arrange for him to pick me up on Friday instead of Saturday, though.

In the afternoon we spent a little more time at the play park before heading down to the beach ready for the labyrinth-building, which according to rumour was supposed to happen from 2-4pm. We arrived at about 2.15 pm to an extremely windy and cold beach, and no sight of any structured activity at all. We hung around for a little while, Tamsin enjoying digging and filling her buckets with sand, but in the end I was too cold and decided to head back to the caravan. Walking back I met everyone walking to the beach, and discovered apparently the labyrinth-building was supposed to start at 3pm, but by then I was too cold and tired to join in, so we carried on back to the campsite.

On both Tuesday and Wednesday Tamsin and I had the following conversation:
T - "I want to go home"
Me - "Why do you want to go home?"
T - "I want to watch Dora"
(very similar to Kessingland last year when every single day of the camp she wanted to go home so she could do 'track', i.e. play with her Brio train set.)

Anyway it was something of a blessing when in conversation with Nic she said she had a Dora the Explorer DVD back at her static caravan, and invited us to go over and view any time. Tamsin was over the moon when I told her, and from then on nagged me senseless until I phoned Nic and arranged to go over. I discovered that Barbara was packing up and planning to spend the night at Nic's, so when I was ready to go I offered to take someone or something with me, and ended up taking B. It was lovely to spend more time with Nic, and later on Barbara, despite her stress levels being a bit high due to some of her kids! I went back to my caravan when Isabelle started getting rather whingey due to being tired. Tamsin was thrilled with her Dora 'fix', though, and it stopped her wanting to go home for the rest of the week!

Thursday was the day when the rain arrived on and off for most of the day. Tamsin and I had a really nice 'girly' start to the morning, snug in our cosy caravan with its lovely fan heater, painting each other's toe-nails and plaiting hair. When we eventually emerged we went up the hill to the main marquee to see what was going on, and came across a belly-dancing session in progress. Tamsin couldn't resist the array of shiny, jingly and sparkly garments and insisted on dressing up a little and joining in, although again she didn't want to attempt any of the 'proper' movements but just ran up and down twirling around instead. After a while I was tired of that so we wandered off for a coffee and cake, and chatted a little with a man who I later discovered was Mike Fortune-Wood. He and Roland Meighan were about to begin setting up for their book-launch (name-dropping, moi?), which although I would have been quite interested to stay for, I knew Tamsin wouldn't have the necessary patience. On attempting to leave she fell flat on her face in lots of sticky mud, which she was quite upset about, so we went back to the caravan for cleaning up and lunch. I was so tired and attempted to have a bit of a nap while Isabelle slept and Tamsin played one of her computer games, but she kept disturbing me and I didn't get much rest. For the rest of the afternoon I felt completely lethargic, so although we went down to the play park again I didn't have the energy for it so just came back to the campsite for a sit and a chat with Sarah, Jax and Joyce, followed by an early bedtime. Actually around dinner-time I started to feel quite sick, and didn't know whether to put it down to the eggs I'd had for lunch brought from home and laid by my own chickens, or to low blood-sugar having not eaten anything else since then. I mentally started planning who I could call to look after my children while I lay in my sick-bed, but thankfully it didn't come to that and I felt better later on, although the nausea came and went for the rest of the evening and the night, and in fact on Friday too.

Friday was going home day, and knowing that Bill was on the way to rescue me from the mud and the children meant I just had to do the packing and clearing up and then wait for him to arrive around 2pm. Tamsin played wall-to-wall computer games but we were all getting a bit tetchy and bored, and the frustration levels rose when Bill phoned firstly to say he was late leaving due to a problem at home, and then later being stuck in traffic rather a lot on the journey down, so he eventually arrived around 4pm. It was lovely to see him and to be taken away from all the mud and noise!

Overall impressions of a Hesfes virgin: not as positive as I would have hoped, sadly. The major memory I am left with is of the really selfish and disrespectful behaviour of the older kids, who were definitely not a good advert for home-education. They didn't care what property they might damage by their behaviour, whether that was Bill's car or Joyce's tent, or how many small children they upset in the playground by hogging the equipment, or how many people they were in danger of hurting by frankly dangerous bike and skate-board riding down the hill. Also, along the lines of Nic's 'retail opportunity' musings, I really did expect to find a range of home-education resources that I could browse through. After all, these aren't things we can find in the shops generally and it would be nice to see some of the curricula, books, computer programs and other resources to have a look at. My good memories are of sitting chatting with on-line friends and hopefully turning them more into real-life friends, and Tamsin playing happily with children she hadn't met before or couldn't remember. Most of the activities or workshops were not suitable for Tamsin, and there was less on offer than I expected although a quick look through some other blogs indicates there were things there that I didn't know about. That in itself is indicative of a certain lack of planning or information-giving. All in all I can't see myself wanting to go next year, or maybe for a few years until Tamsin is likely to get more out of the activities on offer and Isabelle is less likely to be in 'running away toddler'-mode.

Well, that blogging has taken me about 2.5 hours and I still have over 800 e-mails and everybody else's blogs to read, so I'm going to be busy for a while!

I'm clean!!!!!

Ahhh, bliss is a long hot shower after a cold and very muddy field in Dorset. I'm not a major clean freak by any stretch of the imagination, but it feels so good to be home in a clean bed and with hot running water! I still have to navigate the washing mountain, though, and the caravan is still filthy, so major blogging will have to wait a while longer.

Sick, a surprise, and more sick

I've got a sad, poorly baby :-( We made an emergency dash to the doctors this morning, after a really bad night full of crying and Calpol and a morning when she ended up just screaming for ages, but it's just a cold with blocked-up and painful ears. I'm probably not alone in this, but when my babies are ill I'm always afraid they're going to die... so it's rather stressful! Still, at least I didn't get as far as calling an ambulance for what turned out to be a cold, as I did with Tamsin! It all nearly messed up the day's plans to meet my Mum near Abingdon to hand over the dog to look after while we're away at the church weekend and then Hesfes. But we made it in the end.

On the way back, we called in on Bill at work (Oxford Brookes University), leading to moments of delight and then pure farce. The delight was when I looked round the library on the campus, which is the teacher-training department. WOW! Thousands of videos of educational programmes, CD-Roms, cassettes, and fiction and non-fiction children's books - all of which Bill can borrow on his staff ticket. Perfect for the home-educator! I felt like a kid in a sweet-shop! Couldn't stay long, due to a crying Isabelle (again) and a hyperactively running about Tamsin, but did borrow a phonics video and a Learning French CD-ROM, and I will definitely plan to go back and spend more time there soon!

Then I was bursting for the loo, and Isabelle was crying, so I took her and Tamsin off so I could feed Isabelle on the toilet. She had a really nice long feed, so there I was on the toilet, clothing round my ankles, when suddenly she throws up all her milk, right inside my knickers and trousers. Great. Just then the automatic light times out and goes off. So now I'm in the dark, with vomit all down my legs, underwear and trousers, and can't see properly to wipe up, and Isabelle is screaming and snotty again. But it's a quiet day at the college, there are hardly any students about, and nobody has been into the loo while I've been there. So I risk it, and open the cubicle door and shuffle out, knickers and trousers still round my ankles. Now I need to put Isabelle down somewhere so I can wipe up the sick. There isn't enough room to lie her down near the washbasins, so I decide to sit her bottom down in one of the cute little sinks, which hasn't been used for a while so it is nice and dry. As I lower her bottom gently into the sink, the water comes on and drenches her in cold water. They didn't tell me the taps were automatically activated by an infra-red sensor (even in the dark).

We staggered soggily and hysterically back to Bill's office, I threw the baby at him and collapsed.

My three girls

I've been having fun getting used to three feathered friends - I've never done this before but have fancied having chickens in the garden for a long time. I decided to finally get them for my 40th birthday, which was last year but what with having to sort out a run for them, and then being pregnant/tired/having a new baby, we thought it best to wait till the Spring.

These 3 are Cotswold Legbars and lay lovely pale blue eggs - you may be able to buy them at your supermarket in a blue box under the Clarence Court label. We haven't thought of names for them yet - ideas in the comments box, please!


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When Isabelle grabbed a piece of pizza crust and started happily chomping, we thought it was probably time to start weaning!


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So here she is, having her first taste of mango and banana puree. She's sitting on Daddy's knee, and Tamsin is doing the feeding!

This was a week or two ago, and since then she really hasn't been too keen on trying much. Quite often, she refuses to eat anything at all. It's not a problem - I know mummymilk is quite adequate for the job for a long time yet.


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Major disaster!

We've run out of tea-bags, and shops are shut ........ (gasp, wheeze....)

I hope to blog properly later, with pics of the chickens.

Chickens, and returning to work

We have new family members - three Cotswold Legbar chickens, as yet nameless. We got them on Monday morning, but it has been planned for a while - almost a year, in fact. I decided they would be my 40th birthday present last year, but in the event, the amount of time it took to plan how and where to keep them and then my advanced state of pregnancy and tiredness meant we delayed it till the Spring. Bill has spent a fair bit of time constructing a fence to section off a large corner of the garden, and they will have a pretty nice space to live in. I'm anxious about losing them to foxes, but will just have to hope there aren't any daytime roaming ones, which is when they'll be vulnerable.

Tomorrow morning I return to work after maternity leave. I wish I didn't have to - I haven't got time! And it will completely remove any little bit of me-time I've had when I've been at home while Tamsin was at playschool (Isabelle doesn't count as interrupting my me-time much, yet!). But financially we simply can't manage without my income. It's pretty straightforward child-care wise. Tamsin will be at playschool, and I can take Isabelle into the office with me as much as necessary. My Dad will still come over on a Thursday to collect Isabelle from me at about 11am, to have her for a couple of hours, and Kate, with whom I job-share, will do something similar on Fridays. I had Kate's youngest this morning from 9-12.30pm in return. It will work fine, and it's as good a job as I'm likely to get to combine with having a family, with its flexibility, but a private income would be preferable, LOL! I don't know how or if it will work in just over a year's time, when Tamsin will no longer go to playschool, but I'll have to move towards working something out as time goes on. Maybe I'll have to spend money on a childminder.

So the next few weeks will be about getting into a new routine and seeing how it all holds together.

Happy Birthday Benjamin

I wonder what birthdays are like in heaven? Perhaps they don't have them. Perhaps heaven is just one long party anyway! Perhaps he's all grown up already, or perhaps he's ageless now. If he'd still been here he would have been 6 years old today. What a strange thought - that I would have had a 6-year old son. I can't make any sense of that. All I know is a tiny baby. We still miss him, but it doesn't hurt most of the time. But I guess I can be excused a bit of a slump today, when I've abandoned the 'no TV till 5pm' rule and left Tamsin in front of the box while I lie about taking things easy.

Soon we'll go out to take flowers to his grave, and this afternoon we'll make some cakes. I have a candle burning all day.

Love you, Ben.

Wednesday and Thursday

Wednesday had Tamsin at playschool in the morning while I tried to reduce the washing mountain at home. In the afternoon we went to meet with other home-edders at someone's house locally - we went to the February meeting but missed last month. It was OK and quite successful in that Tamsin relatively happily just disappeared off outside without me, to run around with the other kids, which is a first! Makes me hopeful that she might do the same at Kessingland and join in with everyone else more. I asked if anyone was going to Hesfes, and several of them looked at me blankly! I had to explain.... But also quite a few of them have some kids in school and some at home, so they can't go. No-one from that group is going. I did note the classic thing that people say about home-educated kids, but which I hadn't really experienced for myself till yesterday, but I was surprised how easily these youngsters chatted to me and were very comfortable mixing with all ages. Really nice.

Today, Thursday involved me going to Cheltenham for the first 'Gloucestershire Real Nappy Network' meeting - funding has just been received to launch a campaign to promote cloth nappies in the County (focusing on Cheltenham and Gloucester to start with) and I was invited to be on the Steering Group. Tamsin was at playschool and I took Isabelle with me. I took the opportunity of my Dad collecting Tamsin, and myself being in Cheltenham to do a little shopping. Got a few bits and pieces from Booksale and Lush, but was fairly restrained. Got home by 3.30pm as Isabelle got very whingey twice. Once was when she was hungry but I couldn't figure out what was wrong the second time, and I just got fed up and decided to call it a day.

I keep forgetting to say, but I must record what a fabulous job Bill has done with laying a new wooden kitchen floor. It's a vast, vast improvement, and I'm really pleased with it!!

This morning, while Tamsin was at playschool, obviously my first priority was to catch up on the blogring! But I didn't get too bogged down, and also pureed a load of carrots and apples and froze them in icecube trays, prepared week 3 of Sound of the Week, got some ingredients into the breadmaker and set it going, and played with Isabelle a bit.

After collecting Tamsin and coming home via the supermarket for a few essentials, everything went a bit pear-shaped :-( Isabelle had fallen asleep in the car but woke up when we got home, even though she was still tired. After a short time at home, she started to get very whingey, and needed to go back to sleep. The following hour got very stressful, because her normal methods of going to sleep for a nap either by feeding or being rocked in her car seat just didn't work. I was asking Tamsin to keep quiet so that Isabelle could fall asleep, but no matter what I did, she just wouldn't sleep but was just whingeing, fussing and crying. It was taking so long, and I felt I was being so unfair to Tamsin by asking her to keep quiet, that I just left Isabelle to it, hoping she would just fall asleep, while I gave Tamsin some much-needed attention and did the Sound of the Week words and pictures with her. Isabelle's crying just escalated, though, so I tried again and fed her and rocked her again, and eventually she fell asleep. I took her carseat upstairs so that we wouldn't disturb her again, but it was only about 30-40 minutes before she woke up again, still tired. I rocked her carseat and she was just dropping off again, when Tamsin came upstairs. I just managed to shush her in time, and although it disturbed Isabelle a little, she seemed to go to sleep. 2 minutes later she was *screaming*, and the only thing I can think of is she must have been having a bad dream, because there was certainly nothing else to make her scream like that. I knew she was still tired, though, and she almost dropped off again, except that Tamsin kept disturbing us. Poor girl, I'd been asking her to keep quiet just too much, and she couldn't keep doing it, and in the end I just brought Isabelle downstairs again to wake her up fully, even though she was still overtired.

I just don't know how it's 'supposed' to be done. How do you get a baby to nap regularly and properly with an older child or children in the house? We have too many of these times when I'm just always shushing Tamsin and then she interrupts at the crucial moment and Isabelle just won't sleep. Good daytime sleep helps achieve good night-time sleep, and also an over-tired baby won't do so well in many ways, so it's important. I will not just leave her to 'cry it out' - that is not something I could do for many reasons, but how can I take the time to teach her to fall asleep well at naptime and/or bedtime when I've got Tamsin to look after too? It just seems to be an impossible juggling act. At bedtime Tamsin said "I don't love you, because you shout at me..." I don't take the 'not loving' bit to heart, but it does show that it all gets too stressful in this house too often!

After all that fiasco, the rest of the afternoon went better. Tamsin did some more StudyDog (still only at the very beginning though), and, trying to think of something else to do with her when she got bored of that, I signed up for the EducationCity trial, on which she did just a few minutes. I managed to prepare a proper healthy meal again (did some menu planning a few days ago), and then the blessed 5pm came when I put the TV on for an hour of Dora, plus dinner, followed by a bath and bed.

Monday

Was a pretty good day on the whole, although quite hard getting through with no TV until 5pm, and I did also leave the PC off till then and I *really* missed it. I think it was much better without, though, because what tends to happen is I get on the PC and get kind of mesmerised by it and then don't think clearly about what else needs to be done. I stayed more mentally alert yesterday, on the whole! But as I slept through the evening again last night, and Tamsin is at playschool this morning, I thought I would catch up a bit.

So, yesterday included Brio, reading (including this one about evolution as recommended by Nic, which has given me some food for thought and the need to do some more reading and deciding of my own), playdough, and lots of "copy me" games, where Tamsin wants me to copy whatever she is doing (very boring....). We walked the dog, and pretended to be Dora the Explorer and Thomas the Tank Engine. After lunch we went swimming, which both girls really enjoyed, and then home to a meal which I had already (efficiently) mostly prepared earlier, plus the long-awaited hour with Dora on Nick Jr, then TV was switched off again before bed. At the last minute, Tamsin decided she wanted to do some StudyDog, which I didn't think she liked much, but I obliged and she went right back to the beginning to do the letters of the alphabet, which is rather easy for her but I guess a bit of revision and morale-boosting isn't a bad idea.

This morning (Tuesday) she's read all the words on our "sound of the week" poster (still only on week 2, even though we started back in January, LOL! - that's how much of a procrastinator and disorganised I am) and requested to do some more, so I will prepare week 3 sounds and words this morning while she's out and put them together this afternoon.

Isabelle has woken - must go now!

Edit: Forgot to say that a major part of the morning was vacuuming with my new G-Tech cleaner - the big advantage of which is that it is light enough and quiet enough for Tamsin, and in fact she grabbed it off me and insisted on doing the whole house - result! I think I might make this 'her job' to give her some responsibility round the house and some fun as well.

Thomas, a tooth, and Turnoff TV week

Saturday saw Tamsin, Isabelle and me having a Day Out With Thomas while DH stayed at home fitting the new wooden floor in our kitchen, yay! Tamsin was thrilled, as last year, to see Thomas, Henry, Diesel, Toby and so on in 'real life'!! So we had a good but exhausting day out, and came home to find good progress being made with the new floor.

Today has been full of surprises. The first was at church this morning when Isabelle chomped on my finger, as she likes to do, but this time there was a little sharp tooth poking through at the bottom!! Tamsin didn't get her first tooth till 8 months, so this is 'early' for us.

I had already decided that I would start giving Isabelle some real food this week, as I am due to go back to work next week, and although I can have her with me in the office a fair bit and make sure she is well fed before someone takes her away for an hour or two, knowing that she can have some other food if we get the timing all wrong eases my mind a little. And we're only a week earlier than the 'officially allowed' weaning age anyway. My decision was confirmed with the arrival of the tooth, and the fact that she grabbed a piece of Bill's pizza at lunchtime and sucked and chomped on it with great delight. I had hoped to wait till she was grabbing food off us before starting weaning, so I'm glad that happened first! So we then introduced her to a little pureed mango and banana (courtesy of Baby Organix) and she was a bit bemused but interested! I have a little frisson of 'earth-mother' guilt that her first food was not 'home-made and pureed', but I think I can get over it ;-)

My other decision for the week is that the TV will be off all day until 5pm this week, it being TV Turnoff Week. I can't quite bring myself to lose it completely all week, and chose 5pm because then Tamsin can just watch an hour of Dora, her current absolute favourite, while I produce some dinner, and I can watch something in the evening if I want without breaking my own rule! I have yet to decide whether the PC will join the daytime ban - I certainly think it might help our days run smoother if it did, but do I have the willpower?? It would be an interesting experiment for a week.

I also want to just muse a little on something that's bothering me. I have been thinking this week that I can barely remember Isabelle as a newborn. I know that when she was born, I kept on feeling that I wasn't getting enough time just to be with her. I resented the time that Tamsin and other household demands took me away from her, and TBH that feeling that I haven't quite had enough time with her has persisted. I carry her as much as possible, and use a sling when my shoulders/back can cope, but still can't get over this feeling. I think it must be all the other demands, particularly of Tamsin, but I am feeling sad because I feel I am missing out, in some way, of really 'knowing' her and being 'with' her, and this is my last chance as I do feel in many ways that I don't want any more children.

Not much about HE

Not much blatant HE going on here but plenty of playing including Tamsin learning to play 'Snap' with her Thomas the Tank Engine playing cards, which she has enjoyed and requested to do several times over the past few days. Other things have been occupying my mind recently:

1. I've just become Chairperson of the Playgroup that Tamsin attends, and my first important job was to make sure the forms to claim the Nursery Grant were sent in on time..... and I missed it :-( Not the final claim date, thankfully, but the interim date which would have meant the playschool received 50% of its grant this week instead of in June. I had to confess at the first meeting I led last night. Great big OOPS! The rest of the committee and the staff were very kind about it, and turned down my offer to lend them the £2000 or so for the two months that they will now have to wait for the money. The final claim has been posted today, in good time!

2. At last, nearly six years after the event, we have decided what to do with Benjamin's heart and lungs that were retained at Birmingham Children's Hospital. Being the procrastinators that we are, we had wrestled with the issue now and then but not come to a final conclusion. In the end, we have decided to allow them to be used for research purposes if approved by the Hospital Ethics Committee. This way, it may be that they lead to the cause of Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome being discovered some time, and that would be good :-)

3. At the first opportunity we've had to talk together without kids present, I talked to my friend Kate about the 'Center Parcs incident' which I was hurt about a couple of weeks ago. I was surprised to find myself go all weepy about it, but the air is cleared and there is no problem :-)

4. I've been monitoring myself more closely, and I do have serious concerns about my energy levels and my ability to HE. I generally feel tired, irritable and unable to think clearly or constructively from about noon onwards for the rest of the afternoon. Even when I do occasionally manage a nap, I don't recover from it and am still very sluggish all afternoon. And in about 2 weeks time I will be returning to work for 3 mornings per week. We seem to have very little quality time together when I feel alert enough to suggest ideas and participate in activities with Tamsin. Sometimes I gather ideas and plan things for the coming day or two, but a vast amount of the time they just get put aside because I'm tired and not in the mood, and TV is easier. I will keep thinking about this and monitoring how things are going, but I don't feel good about my ability to do a good job with HE at the moment. It may be that I just need a good detox diet and some regular exercise, but I'm generally too knackered to plan and carry through those plans either!

Anyway, I now have about 1.5 hours before Tamsin comes home, and I've got to go and do a big food shop as the cupboards are almost bare.

What is it with these women???!

I'm sorry, I can't keep this in any longer. I have watched a couple of TV programmes like this in the past couple of days, and right now I am watching "Who Rules the Roost", and the world seems to be full of people who have sparkling kitchens and dust-less living rooms, and *completely ignored* children!!! And this woman is *disinfecting the garden*!!! OMG, what is the point of that? Disinfecting the slide, swing and playhouse door handle? Please, get a life, and some decent information about micro-organisms and the human immune system!!!

I cannot believe how much energy people spend on scrubbing, dusting, tidying and cleaning. Yes, it would be lovely to live in a pristine house, but not at the expense of leaving my children uncuddled, unplayed with and scared to move in case they make a mess. And when I do have time to spare, I would rather sit and read, or blog, or chat to friends on the phone, than clean!

I'm not saying my way is the perfect way - there must be a middle ground somewhere. I probably don't spend enough time cleaning and tidying, but for heaven's sake, some people are *too clean and tidy*!!

Wake up!

(Sigh) ... yes, slept through the evening again last night. This is getting boring. Missed ER, although at least I can catch up on Sunday or Monday on other channels....

Yesterday was good - Tamsin went to playschool in the morning and I arranged for my Dad to pick her up and look after her for the afternoon; meanwhile I drove Bill to work in Oxford so that he could pick up his (old) new car - an Astra - and he showed off his newest offspring to his work colleagues. Then I went into Oxford city centre to SHOP! Found the Laura Ashley sale and bought some stuff for Tamsin - how come I just find it impossible to shop and buy stuff for myself these days, but can spend any amount of money on the kids? Also interesting how I never even look at full-price stuff (except shoes and underwear) but only buy from sales or 2nd hand stuff! I also had a fab hour or so browsing round Borders - my idea of bliss!

Today seems to have been manic with not much achieved. I feel like I've been rushing from one thing to another, constantly being interrupted by the demands of 2 children, and never actually getting anything finished. I keep trying to tidy up, and never manage it. Anyway, what we *have* done is:
- some more scissors/cutting practice (cut pics out but never got round to sticking them)
- dancing to music (PE, rhythm/music skills)
- reading a few nursery rhymes/poems
- lots of pretending/role play
- lots of 'Dora' episodes watched, and then the TV switched off afterwards
- went to the library: Tamsin rode her bike there
- a little bit of play with the cheap Geomag-equivalents (which Bill bought recently without knowing anything about the blogring bandwagon!)
- I've washed, dried and folded 3 loads of washing - 4th load needs drying.
- received an unusual number of phone calls - that's probably where much of the time went.

Isabelle has been charming people everywhere she goes with spontaneous smiles without waiting to be smiled at first! I wonder if she's going to turn out to be more outgoing and confident with people than Tamsin is at the moment.

I was thinking today how, if Tamsin was going to Reception in September as she 'should', I would be really worried about it. She still needs a *lot* of Mummy time, has snuggled on my knee while doing the scissors/cutting and reading, wants to be carried a lot, was worriedly asking this morning whether we were going to stay together all day today or not, and I really feel that it would be very detrimental to her to be forced away from me for 5 days a week. What a relief not to be facing that.

Hooray!

Friend's baby arrived safe and well late yesterday afternoon. Girl, 8lb 3.5oz. No other details except that I guess this means the induction took 24+ hours, so I hope it wasn't too awful, but I will find out in due course. She's the friend who had one stillborn twin in her first pregnancy, so I'm extra-specially glad that all has gone well.

I haven't heard about the other friend's baby - must make a few calls and find out what's happened/is happening!

5pm: edit - A baby boy, also born yesterday at home in the early hours!! Two babies on one day - wowee!!

Another lost evening

Yes, yet another evening slept through, slightly different this time in that we all (kids and parents) fell asleep together in the big bed and nobody moved until 11.30pm... at which stage Bill and I got up to do some of the stuff we hadn't got done.

Anyway, yesterday had some notable stuff. Firstly, Tamsin didn't request TV at breakfast time as usual, but generally tootled about and got interested in her Learning Land CDs and magazines again. After breakfast she got on with some of the CD-Rom learning activities, including a 'spot the difference' puzzle which is so important in learning to read, but which isn't one of her strongest skills, so it was good she got some practice on that and I saw some improvement after she had done several of them. Cutting with scissors is another of her weaknesses, so I printed off some practice pages (can't remember where from (maybe Donna Young?) but one of the sites recommended on the MuddlePuddle e-mail list recently). She didn't do very well! The first page I showed her had horizontal lines printed across the page to practice cutting, and she insisted that she couldn't do it that way, but cut one big vertical cut instead and then just chopped the rest into little bits. Perhaps a little practice everyday is called for. It's another skill that indicates fine motor control and therefore helps with writing later on.

Mid-morning we took the dog out for a walk, and practiced careful listening. A couple of times I stopped and asked her to shut her eyes, and then tell me all the sounds she could hear. She got most of them - normally 4 or 5 different sounds at a time - but strangely she missed what to me was the most obvious which was the grand orchestra of birdsong! Later on (when we were far from anyone in the fields, LOL!) we practiced copying the sounds we could hear. Both these skills are recommended in the recently-received Fundamentals course.

She did of course watch Dora the Explorer in the morning (NB Isabelle slept nearly all morning - in the sling!) and then, after a quick lunch, we went off to Stratford-on-Avon. I wanted to get some summer shoes or sandals for her, and some slip-on trainers for me. Success for Tamsin but not for me. Then we went off to the swimming pool which was only the second time for me taking both of them. I had got some arm-bands recently, so although it seems a retrograde step to start putting Tamsin in inflatable stuff when she's never been used to it, it helped me feel a bit more confident in dealing with both of them on my own.

When we got home, Tamsin had Isabelle absolutely screaming with laughter by jumping over her repeatedly - a move which I felt was somewhat risky but it was so funny to hear Isabelle laughing so much that I didn't stop them, and no injuries occurred!

Then came dinner, which Tamsin refused (brown rice instead of white ...) and the somnolent evening.

This morning (Tuesday) Tamsin is back at playschool, so I'm really enjoying the peace in the house as so far Isabelle is still asleep and I can get some stuff done!

The weekend...

Boring title, but maybe the contents will be even more boring. I'm sure I ought to be able to think of something significant we did at the weekend, but my mind is mostly blank (as usual)...

Went to an NCT second-hand sale on Saturday, but didn't get much. It was just too crowded and not much there in the 4-5 year range which is what I was after. Bill said beforehand "don't bring any more toys home", so I had to avoid those...! I did buy a 'teaching French' game which will be useful for later, and a couple of workbooks for £1 each instead of £2.99. Oh, and when I recently got out from the loft all the 6-12 month clothes, I found everything except vests and babygros - I wonder where they've all gone? So I tried to get some more but there wasn't much around so had to buy some new ones too.

There does seem to have been a bit of progress on reading with Tamsin. She requested "Hop on Pop" one night at bedtime, and then asked to read it herself ... so we did lots of sounding out of letter sounds and blending them together, and she did quite well! Since then, while reading I've suggested she tries to read the odd simple three-letter word, and she quite enjoys trying. I think we may be on the second step of the reading ladder!

I have 2 friends due to give birth any day now ... and one of them is going in to be induced today because in her first pregnancy one of her twins was stillborn, so she's too anxious to go past 39 weeks. So I'm nervously awaiting news....

Not a productive day then...

I don't quite know where the day's gone, but I seem to have achieved precious little. The CTF thing took a long time with lots of web research and reading, and in the end have decided on what seems to be the only ethical CTF account there is, despite the high fees. It's all a bonus anyway, isn't it?

Isabelle only took extremely short naps, apart from when I went with her and then we managed an hour with a bit of feeding/soothing in the middle. The house is still a complete mess and there's nothing for dinner except something instant from the freezer. Ah well....

Jobs for the day

Tamsin's gone to my Dad's for the day - great relief on my part as she got so distraught last time that she didn't go. Don't know what that was all about. Anyway as it's still Easter holidays she hasn't been going to playschool this week and last week, so it's just lovely to have some quiet space where she is out of the house. However, anyone who can tell me how to get Isabelle to stay asleep for more than 15 minutes at a time will earn my undying gratitude! She's still tired, she hasn't napped long enough, yet she just won't stay asleep.

Anyway, today's jobs list is:

1. Investigate and decide on Child Trust Fund account - DONE
2. Do a bit more 'money' administration
3. Do some tidying and filing of the piles of papers
4. Read and get a grip on the "Fundamentals" pre-school development programme which arrived yesterday
5. Have a nap and try to get rid of this headache I've had for 3 days - had nap but still got headache :-(

I hate titles!

But apart from that, there are some nice things to blog. All out of order, just as they occur to me.

This morning started, by Tamsin's request, with Studydog, when she saw the icon on my computer desktop. (It's not very often she gets to the computer before me in the morning!!) I discouraged her from starting with the letters of the alphabet, as it was rather tedious and she knows all her letter sounds, so we went straight to 'beginning letter sounds', where she did reasonably well when she could pay enough attention to actually listen to the instructions. However, I don't like the way they use letter names rather than sounds, as it seems to me that's just unnecessarily confusing the situation. When she moved on to rhyming sounds and then the consonants with two different sounds, she didn't do too well. I got rather irritated by her not listening properly to the instructions, or maybe they were just too complicated for her, and suggested she switch it off, which she was happy to do.

We also did some train track, which hasn't happened for a few days (I think her Thomas obsession is beginning to flag a little, to be replaced by a Dora obsession). I managed to make the living room look relatively respectable while she watched a bit of Nick Jr. I know a better way would be to engage her in helping to clear up with me, but she hates loud noises and always wants to stay well away from the vacuum cleaner.

I can't think what else happened this morning, but after lunch we went out. Tamsin requested a trip to the toyshop, but as the one in town is closed on a Tuesday I suggested we went to the next town. However after a trip to one shop, Isabelle wanted feeding, so we went back to the car and then a sag of energy on my part made me feel I wanted some adult company rather than continuing to only engage with a 3-year old all afternoon, so I called in to a friend's house and Tamsin played happily with her kids while I had some welcome intelligent chat!

Yesterday I decided not to take a trip to the Cotswold Farm Park due to the bad weather forecast, but when by lunchtime, the anticipated rain had not arrived, I changed my mind and we went anyway. We had a lovely time, with a very educational view of a lamb being born!!! Tamsin also held a chick, and enjoyed the pigs, calves, goat kids, rabbits, guinea pigs and riding round on both the pedal tractors and electric tractors. She really impressed me on the latter 'ride' as she stopped at the lines on the painted roads and looked each way before moving on!

I can't remember much about the weekend except that Bill took up the grotty carpet and lino in our kitchen in preparation for a new wooden floor. I'm planning to paint the walls, and maybe even the cabinets as well.

Oh, and there was also the phone call from my mum, complete with hysterical sobbing. This is maybe only the beginning of the fallout from my brother's recent divorce. My ex-SIL had written mum a letter in response to receiving a birthday card from my Mum. My Mum read it out to me, and to me it sounded incredibly thoughtful, well-balanced and truthful, but my Mum took great offence to a phrase which included a reference to my parents' "bad divorce" ... I didn't quite get to the bottom of why she was offended at the time, as she put the phone down on me in floods of tears, but spoke to her later and could hardly believe my ears. Over the years the relationship between my Mum and my brother and SIL has been touchy and difficult at times, but now the divorce has happened I think the knives are out. But to hear my Mum spitting out critical comments on my SIL's character in an almost exact description of her *own* character was almost unbelievable, and quite funny! I guess we're all quite blind to our own faults, but it was hard to believe she couldn't see what she was saying. I did point it out to her..... Ugh, I could blog about this whole situation for hours, but suffice to say I would rather spend time in my SIL's company than my mum's, and also that situations like this leave me feeling tense and unsettled, as I am *so* not good at conflict.

Anyway, gotta go now and try and catch the end of Ebay's 5p listing day to sell some baby clothes.

The one where Bill comes home...

Bill is back safely and all has gone well - he now knows all about the insides of laser printers - thrilling, isn't it?

Anyway I have made efforts to give Tamsin much more attention today, including some particularly concentrated one-to-one time just before lunch. It will be interesting to see if continuing to do this will ease the separation anxiety she has been showing occasionally lately, and reduce the general clinginess and demandingness. I just have to try to overcome my extreme boredom at playing 3-year old games ... and try to steer it to activities I find more acceptable like reading to her, doing jigsaws or some craft stuff.

Well it couldn't have got worse so it had to get better!

My mood, that is. Thank goodness I've felt better today. Bill is away on a course till tomorrow, and my Mum has come to stay - arriving at lunchtime today till tomorrow. I still managed to waste all morning on the computer, searching for possible birthday presents for Tamsin - and found this, only available in the USA! Hmm, but she is now a BIG Dora fan, so I have to decide if the cost of it and getting it shipped over here (an extra $65 surface mail, yikes or $225 air mail - I don't think so!!) is totally out of the question or should we just stick to a trampoline or a playhouse or something?

Anyway, Mum arrived after that, and we went off out in the foggy mist/misty fog?? to a lavender farm where we had a fantastic late lunch and then on to Bourton-on-the-Water model railway museum which thrilled Tamsin. Later on, a conversation with my Mum may have shed light on Tamsin's recent behaviour problems in that she needs some concentrated one-to-one time from me, rather than us just both being 'around' but not really doing stuff together. I was thinking I was spending plenty of time with her, but really I haven't been paying her much positive attention, as blogged yesterday, because I've really been finding her very difficult. But probably I need to turn that round and give her the concentrated attention and then she'll be less difficult to be with? Worth a try, anyway. It's strange how I know all this stuff very clearly - kids misbehave as negative attention is better than no attention at all - but it's so easy to miss it in your own life.

Anyway, an early-ish night (10.30pm now) is probably in order and turn over a new leaf tomorrow!!!

Catching up

There's been some good stuff going on lately, but I keep being so tired I just fall asleep in the evening and don't get to blog.

We had a good Easter weekend including getting some jobs done or at least started which have been outstanding for months or years, including stripping the old varnish off some old tables and starting to re-paint, painting Tamsin's new toyboxes, Bill getting a towel rail up in the bathroom, and buying wooden flooring to go in the kitchen and toilet. We also had a great morning at church on Easter Sunday when seven baptisms took place, five of which were planned in advance and two were spontaneous!

Tamsin's done some CD-Rom learning, loves to type into a blank Word document, decorated some eggs with me on Good Friday and learned a lot of Spanish on Easter Sunday courtesy of Dora. However we don't like the constant "I want one of those" that she shouts at almost every advert, so as of yesterday as far as she is concerned Nick Jr is 'broken' (well, if you take the Sky card out, it is!) and it's CBeebies or nothing. I've done quite a lot of switching the TV off and refusing to put it on for a few hours, as I really don't like it on that much. Trouble is, I have to have the stamina for non-TV days.

And today especially I have been in a foul mood and could quite happily have sent everybody else to go and live with Grandpa forever, or something. I don't know what comes first - my bad mood or Tamsin's irritating behaviour. Maybe I just don't like 3-year olds. I know mine drives me mad far too much of the time, and I'm finding I just don't want to interact with her. I don't want to have to repeat myself 3 or 4 times, ending up shouting before she takes any notice of me; I don't want to have to repeat the rules of acceptable behaviour 20 times per day for another two years before she follows them; I don't want to pretend to be a dog on a lead or any other kind of plaything, and I don't want to be climbed on, jumped on and generally prodded about at all!

Thank goodness that Bill had an extra day off today, so he took over when I fell asleep on the sofa at lunchtime and then took Tamsin out for the afternoon. If you're reading, Bill, please do that again - lots!

Interview questions

Thanks to Sarah for another great idea. It's a way for us all in the blogring to get to know each other a little better. If you want to participate, look at the end of this entry to find out how.

1. Can you tell us something about your 'decision to home ed' process - formative books, influential people, that sort of thing?

I really don't know when I first heard about the idea of home education, or when it became attractive to me. It feels like something I've known about forever. I think it became much more focussed for me when I read John Holt, "How Children Fail" and "How Children Learn". I went on the web and found his Growing Without Schooling website, and since then, as is my way, I have read an awful lot, including "Free Range Education" by Terri Dowty, and several others. I would say I have been sold on the theory of home education ever since I heard of it, but unsure about my ability to actually do it in terms of having the commitment and energy for it. Then somebody gave me the very wise advice that it isn't an irrevocable decision - and just to take it a year at a time (or even a term at a time if necessary)!


2. How do you think you will measure 'success' in your family's home education? (Feel free to reword the question - I'm trying to get at what will make you feel that you've succeeded, as opposed to any 'success' on the children's behalf!)

I want my children to feel free to be interested in anything. At school, there were definitely subjects it wasn't "cool" to be interested in, e.g. poetry, classical music, maths, or in fact to be intelligent or particularly successful at anything (teenage years particularly). If my children have wide-ranging interests that don't just coincide with the current 'fashions', find their passion in life and pursue it, and are the sort of people who work hard in their chosen field, then I will be delighted. I also want them to be people of integrity, to aim for excellence of character, and full of care and compassion for others. If they are that sort of person, I don't mind what they're doing for a living!


3. What is your all time favourite book and why (adults or children's, doesn't matter!)?

This is so difficult, as there are so many books that I have found powerful and moving and have taught me something, but there are 2 books that have had the most life-changing impact on me (apart from the Bible), so I'm going to 'cheat' and tell you about both! The first is "The Continuum Concept" by Jean Liedloff. Not that I follow it very closely, because I now think it doesn't have to be an 'all or nothing' thing, but it is the book that turned me away from conventional parenting and gave me a greater insight into some of the problems of so-called 'civilised' societies. It gave me an awful lot of food for thought over the years, and has probably changed who I am quite noticeably. I came across it nearly 20 years ago, when I didn't have children and didn't intend having any, but felt it contained something of the absolute "truth" about life that I constantly seek and love.
The second book is "Stormie" by Stormie Omartian. This is the life story of a 60s singer and actress who was on the verge of suicide when she found faith in Jesus and gradually, over 14 years, was restored to full emotional health. When I have been barely clinging on by my fingernails, it has been this story that has given me hope and the strength to carry on.

4. If you could live anywhere in the world where would you live?

I would love to live for a while somewhere in the mountains, where I could ski a lot! I would adore living in Colorado (even though John Denver's no longer there) or somewhere like Switzerland would be great. I think I would also love the California coast for a while. Having said all that, I love living where I do now (North Cotswolds, Gloucestershire) and would probably be very homesick for the UK if I lived anywhere abroad, and would miss my friends and family, so I think I'll probably stay put!


5. What is the thing that annoys you above all else, and what is the thing that you love above all else? Interpret any way you like!!!

The thing that can get me angrier than anything else is people talking about me behind my back, in a kind of condescending way, "there, there, poor dear, we'd better discuss what's best for her because she's not capable...". This has a specific history, which I don't want to go into, but I know exactly where it comes from and I have been known to go incandescent with rage when it felt like this was what was happening to me. I hate, therefore, not knowing what official correspondence is saying about me (thinking of doctor's referral letters and the like) in case that's the attitude they're taking.

The thing I love above all else - well, I feel I ought to say here that it's Jesus since, based on my true beliefs, He is the one to whom I owe everything, but in simple 'feelings' terms, the winners are my children, particularly so because it's been so unexpected. I didn't want children when I was younger, thought I would never have any, and certainly didn't consider myself maternal at all. What a complete surprise and revelation it has been to me to have children and discover that my entire worldview has changed and my entire image of myself has changed so drastically. And I just love how my own children (most of the time) have to me a kind of 'Ready Brek' glow around them that just makes them the most beautiful things in the whole world. I do love my husband, too, but I 'expected' that, and it's the shock of loving my children so much that makes it seem so strong to me.


If YOU want to be interviewed:

1. Leave me a comment saying “interview me.”
2. I will respond by asking you five questions (not the same as you see here).
3. You will update your blog/site with the answers to the questions. (If you don’t have a blog, let this inspire you to begin one!!)
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions